Of all Queen Victoria’s children, Princess Helena Augusta Victoria remains the least known. She was a deeply private figure, and most of what is known about her comes from the memoirs of her mother. Helena was the queen’s forgotten daughter, though their relationship was far more complicated than most people realize. Helena’s life began inauspiciously.
She was born on May 25, 1846, but she was not among the healthiest of the royal children. At birth, her father described her as pale, and although she eventually recovered under the care of the royal physicians, her arrival nearly weakened one of the most powerful women in the world: Queen Victoria herself. Helena’s birth was so difficult that the queen, who had once scolded her husband for wanting more than two days of honeymoon, was forced to suspend her royal duties to recover. Helena grew up with eight royal siblings, and competition among them was fierce.
In childhood, her brothers teased her relentlessly. But this small girl was neither shy nor withdrawn. If her brothers went too far, Princess Helena would respond by punching them squarely on the nose. Royal disputes did not end there.
Her relationships with her brothers may have needed improvement, but her rivalry with her sisters was even sharper. Like other princesses, Helena was multi-talented. She played the piano, had a gift for drawing, rode horses, and, at her father’s insistence, learned cooking, cleaning, and gardening. In many ways, she was one of the most gifted of Victoria’s children.
Then came her younger sister. The king and queen welcomed Princess Louise into the family with great joy, but for Helena, Louise became a thorn in her side. Louise not only displaced Helena as the youngest, but it quickly became clear that her talents surpassed Helena’s. Louise and her other sisters soon overshadowed Helena, and a family tragedy deepened her suffering.
On December 14, 1861, Helena received devastating news that changed her life forever: her beloved father, Prince Albert, had died of typhoid fever. The entire family grieved deeply. Helena wrote to a friend: “I adored my father. I loved him more than anything in the world.
He was my support and my guide. Those were the happiest hours of my life, but now everything is over. ” What her mother did next only increased Helena’s grief. In the depths of her sorrow, the queen ordered Helena and her sisters to leave Windsor.
The entire royal family moved to Osborne House, where they began a period of mourning and isolation from the public. In her grief, Helena should have found support within her family, but her strained relationships made that nearly impossible. Her mother’s behavior only increased her loneliness. Without her husband’s support, the queen relied entirely on Helena’s older sister, Princess Alice, as an unofficial secretary.
But Alice herself needed help. As the next daughter, Helena was the obvious choice. Yet the queen objected, considering Helena unsuitable because of her tendency to cry. To make matters worse, the queen chose Louise, Helena’s younger sister, as her assistant instead.
Left to herself, Helena soon found herself in serious trouble. Isolated from her family, she looked for love and affection elsewhere. Unfortunately, she found it in Carl Ruland. The relationship was doomed from the start.
Ruland was not only her father’s former private secretary but also about thirteen years older than Helena. When her mother learned of the affair in 1863, she was furious. She immediately dismissed Ruland and sent him back to Germany. Helena was likely devastated, but her suffering was only beginning.
The queen decided that the best way to keep her teenage daughter out of trouble was to marry her off as quickly as possible. Of course, Helena’s mother would choose her husband, but Helena faced difficulties finding a suitable match. According to Helena’s biographer, Helena was, in his words, “stout, shabby in appearance, and double-chinned. ” In other words, she was not the perfect princess of fairy tales.
Being a middle daughter also made securing an appropriate marriage harder. Helena already suffered from many factors beyond her control, but her mother added another condition that made marriage difficult. The queen had married off Helena’s elder sister in 1862, which forced Helena into the position of the queen’s unofficial secretary. To the queen’s surprise, Helena excelled at her work and proved an excellent companion.
As a result, Helena’s mother stipulated that any man wishing to marry her must come and live with them. As one might imagine, very few men met these strict conditions, and this unintentionally tore the royal family apart. The choice fell on Prince Christian of Schleswig-Holstein. There were several problems with this match.
Prince Christian was poor, many years older than Helena, and his family’s duchies were disputed between Prussia and Denmark. The Crown Princess, Helena’s elder sister, supported the marriage, while Alice publicly opposed it. They were not alone in objecting. Alexandra of Denmark, the wife of Helena’s brother Edward and daughter of the Danish king, was extremely displeased.
She believed the disputed territories belonged to her father. For her, the queen’s decision to marry Helena to Christian was scandalous. Needless to say, the marriage caused a political uproar. But how did Helena react?
Despite the age difference, the political controversy, and the family problems it caused, Helena and Christian were happy. When Helena met her future husband, she found him, as she said, “kind, polite, calm, and dignified. ” Helena and her mother agreed that the match was perfect. The marriage took place, though it did not improve Helena’s standing in the royal family.
Her wedding on July 5, 1866, was chaotic. Edward VII, her eldest brother and Alexandra’s husband, almost boycotted the ceremony in protest. One guest suffered a sudden attack of gout. And one royal guest remarked that Helena looked as though she were “marrying an aged uncle.
” It was hardly an auspicious start, and family rifts widened. Any ordinary marriage might have collapsed under these pressures. But Helena and her new husband defied the odds with a relatively quiet union. They devoted themselves to one another.
Princess Helena, once considered the queen’s least marriageable daughter, found considerable happiness. If only her mother would stop interfering. Although Helena had promised to stay close to the queen after marrying Christian, keeping that promise proved nearly impossible. A year into the marriage, Helena became pregnant.
Juggling the demands of being her mother’s close confidante and personal secretary, the duties of a wife, and the physical strain of pregnancy was more than she could manage. Her body began to betray her. Like her mother, Helena bore many children in quick succession. She gave birth to Christian Victor in 1867, Albert in 1869, Helena Victoria in 1870, and Marie Louise in 1872.
Repeated pregnancies exhausted her body. Added to her poor health, it was no wonder she was constantly ill. Yet her mother showed no sympathy. Instead, the queen accused her of hypochondria, which she claimed Christian encouraged.
Helena had genuine reason for constant worry about her health. Between 1869 and 1871, she suffered bouts of illness including rheumatism, joint pain, and severe congestion in her lungs. There was another serious health problem, one more dangerous than all the others. Alongside her many ailments, Helena struggled with drug addiction.
Her drugs of choice were opium and laudanum, prescribed by her physician. Despite her addiction, Helena tried to build a life for herself away from the court and her domineering mother. The distance gave her much-needed relief, but her life was not free of tragedy. On May 12, 1876, Helena and her husband welcomed their fifth child, Harold.
Her joy was brief: Harold lived only eight days. Just one year later, another tragedy struck. On May 7, 1877, Helena gave birth to a stillborn child. The loss of two children in succession shocked her.
Unsurprisingly, the grieving Helena became difficult to deal with. According to the queen, Helena had become, in her words, “sensitive and quick-tempered due to her ill health. ” Helena refused to do anything about her health, leaving her life to fate. Fate soon dealt another blow to her family, though this tragedy was different.
On December 14, 1877, Helena’s sister Alice died of diphtheria. Though Helena had initially opposed her own marriage to Christian, it was Alice who convinced Edward to attend the wedding. The sisters had their differences, but they supported each other in the darkest times. Alice had been especially worried about their mother’s influence on Helena, and as it turned out, she was right to worry.
While Helena recovered from her losses, she focused more on her husband and children and spent less time with her mother. The queen, who had arranged the marriage specifically so Helena could spend more time with her, was deeply displeased. To make matters worse, Helena developed a passion that entirely displeased her mother: she took a strong interest in the women’s rights movement. Unlike the queen, who loathed the idea, Helena actively campaigned for women’s rights, lending her royal title to causes she believed in.
Nursing and embroidery were among the feminist causes she championed, leading to the creation of an organization close to her heart. In 1887, Helena became president of the British Nurses’ Association. In that role, she supported the radical idea of establishing a register of nurses to improve the education and status of these dedicated women. Helena was no mere figurehead.
When some members opposed her ideas, she did not hesitate to silence them. In leadership, she emulated her mother, running organizations with strict efficiency. When anyone questioned her orders, Helena would simply reply: “This is my wish, and that is enough. ”
In public, Helena radiated strength and confidence.
No one knew she suffered unbearable torment in private. By 1894, her opium addiction was out of control. Things deteriorated so badly that her mother noticed and became deeply concerned. Helena’s husband eventually went to the doctor and begged him to help her quit the addiction.
When Helena found out, she was furious. Unable to cope without opium, she asked the doctor for more drugs. In response, he cut off her supply abruptly. Of course, Helena suffered severe withdrawal symptoms, even complaining of losing her sight.
Eventually, with encouragement from her elder sister, she overcame her opium addiction. It was a remarkable personal achievement, but a tragic family event cut short her celebration. By 1900, Helena’s eldest son was a highly ambitious young man. Determined to build his future, he joined the British Army, fought in battles, and rose to the rank of major.
No doubt Helena was very proud of him, and she paid little attention when he went on another adventure to South Africa. What she did not know was that this would be the last time she ever saw him. On October 25, 1900, Helena’s mother received a worrying telegram. Helena’s eldest son had contracted malaria in South Africa and was seriously ill.
Five days later, Helena received a second telegram, this time with far worse news. Her son had died of the disease. Helena bore the terrible news relatively well, but her mother could not. The elderly queen did not accept the death of her grandson easily, and her health soon declined.
Helena and her younger sister Beatrice spent their days at their mother’s bedside, watching her fade. On January 22, 1901, Helena’s mother died. A new reign began, but for Helena, her mother’s death meant more family tragedy and personal misfortune. 1901 was not a happy year for Helena’s family.
Her elder sister, the Crown Princess, was sixty years old and seriously ill. Helena received many moving letters from her sick sister describing the unbearable pain she constantly felt, but she could do little to help. By August, the pain became too much, and her sister died. Helena’s siblings disappeared from her life one by one.
But the loss of Edward hit her hardest. With the death of their mother, the new king, Edward VII, took the throne alongside his wife, Alexandra of Denmark. Helena’s brother was not close to her, and his wife’s intense jealousy of the royal family did not encourage a close sibling relationship. Alexandra was still upset about Helena’s marriage to Christian and was determined to strike a final blow.
Despite all the pain and suffering Helena had endured over the previous two years, she had continued her duties as head of the Army Nursing Service. Once Alexandra became queen, she showed sudden and suspicious interest in nursing and insisted on replacing Helena as president. The proposal caused great tension between Helena and Alexandra, further straining Helena’s relationship with her elder brother. Helena had little say in the matter, so she stepped down and handed control to Alexandra.
The ever-loyal Princess Helena continued to support the monarchy, but she did not serve the new king for long. Helena was not the only one in the family to suffer from addiction; her elder brother, the newly crowned Edward VII, was a heavy smoker, which ultimately killed him. On May 6, 1910, after only nine years on the throne, Helena’s brother suffered several heart attacks and died. Four years later, the First World War broke out across Europe, and Helena’s family once again sank into internal conflict.
Albert, like her eldest son, joined the army, but not the British Army. Helena’s son served in the Prussian Army. When the war began, he fought under German command, on the side of the enemy opposing Helena and her country. Cut off from her son, Helena could only wait for the end of the war, which brought her another shock.
None of Helena’s children had produced children of their own, and by 1917, she had resigned herself to never becoming a grandmother. But everything changed when Albert confessed to a secret relationship that had produced a daughter named Valerie Marie, although he never revealed the identity of the girl’s mother. In the most painful way possible, Helena became a grandmother. Helena needed a distraction from Albert and his scandal.
Despite her advancing age, she spent the First World War in feverish activity. Her passion for nursing had not faded; it was now more important than ever. She spent most of the war visiting as many hospitals as possible, lifting the spirits of patients, and her love of charity made her beloved among ordinary people. She even celebrated her golden wedding anniversary during the war.
Ironically, Helena’s controversial marriage lasted longer than those of any of her siblings. But that did not mean her husband was perfect. He contributed little to the British royal family. Was he a great father?
Yes. An ideal husband? Certainly. A useful member of the monarchy?
Not really. Even after years of living with Helena’s family, her husband offered little help with her royal duties. That did not soften the blow of what came next. In 1917, after many years of marriage, Helena’s husband died at the age of eighty-six.
That was tragedy enough, but for Helena, the nightmare had only just begun. Not only had she lost her husband, but commissioners tried to evict her from her residences, Schomberg House and Cumberland Lodge. Given the cost of maintaining her household, it was a dreadful way for Helena to spend her final years. In the spring of 1923, Helena fell ill with the illness that would kill her: influenza.
By the end of May, the elderly princess suffered a heart attack, and she passed away on the morning of June 9, 1923. After her death, historians wrote little about the intensely private and reserved princess. Most of what is known about her comes from her mother, who was sometimes cruel and unfair. When historians mentioned Helena, they criticized her appearance and character.
It is true that Helena and some of her royal siblings struggled with weight, but these criticisms may not be entirely fair. Many of the sharp remarks about Helena came from her mother’s letters and diaries. Later historians simply accepted the queen’s words as fact. Helena was far from the meek and quiet figure historians portrayed.
Despite what others thought of her, her royal status made her desirable, and Helena used that to her advantage. When she wanted to promote her new Royal School of Needlework, she held tea parties at the school for high-society ladies eager to spend time with her. The presence of so many prominent women created a great stir and widespread interest in the school, which still operates to this day.